Case Closed! (???)

Ah, now I know why Mordor-on-the-Potomac should be spending much, much more of what would be the taxpayers' money, if the taxpayers had any money, on medical research. It's so the nomenklatura might have longer careers:

Jack Kemp would still be alive if the federal government had done a better job funding cancer research, Sen. Arlen Specter said Sunday, one day after Kemp, the 1996 Republican vice presidential nominee, died of cancer.

The Pennsylvania senator, who last week switched his party affiliation from Republican to Democrat, made the claim on two Sunday shows.

[ ... ]

Specter added: "If we had pursued what President Nixon declared in 1970 as the war on cancer, we would have cured many strains. I think Jack Kemp would be alive today. And that research has saved or prolonged many lives, including mine."

Specter has been treated for Hodgkin's disease, a cancer of the lymphatic system. Through his Web site, specterforthecure.com, the senator has called for more federal resources and funding to be directed toward medical research.

Hmmmmmm. Longer life for Jack Kemp and Arlen Spectre is the best argument for the Federal War on Cancer? Surely there must be more compelling arguments than that. I'll also have to admit that I didn't know there was a War on Cancer, administered by the same entity that brought us the War on Drugs and the War on Terrorism. No wonder there's so much cancer around!