Everything Has Its Price

So, I'm on my way home from the day job last night, and it's going on 6 pm, and I'm listening to NPR. It would usually be "All Things Considered" at that hour, I think, and maybe it still was, but it was all Republican convention coverage. (Sorry, don't know that I can link a particular broadcast, and I'm too lazy to try just now ... maybe you heard it.) I happened to catch a live interview with Kansas senator Sam Brownback, who's all Christian-conservative and pro-life and all of that, and he was being asked about The Sarah Palin Thing. Now, here's where I wish I could link to the interview, because I can't quote him exactly; I was just doing the old-school driving and listening to the radio procedure. But I think I can paraphrase him fairly. What he said was: McCain really wanted Joe Lieberman, but, you know, it's a shame, but that just wasn't getting any support among the delegates when it was floated, and it just couldn't be done. Because, you know, there are some basic differences between Joe Lieberman and us on, you know, the social issues. I had a speech prepared to put his name into nomination, but it just wasn't happening, and it's a real shame, because, you know, he's really with us on security.

Well, I got to thinking: there the whole thing is, in a nutshell. Summed up so neatly. People like me, people who don't think it should be legal to kill babies, people who acquired criminal records back in the Operation Rescue days ... we're supposed to be supporting the GOP, and we're supposed to be tickled pink with "leaders" on the order of Sen. Brownback. In my mind, Sen. Brownback can usefully serve as a symbol for the whole GOP. He says he's "pro-life," and I have no reason to believe he's lying. I'm willing to assume that he is "pro-life," whatever he may understand that to mean. But, you know, he has his priorities. First of all, he's got to have his war. No matter what else, he's going to get his war on. The entire party: they may profess some mild interest in circumscribing abortion, at the margins. They may affect to think that the inverted fraternity getting all gay-married will weaken marriage (although their own serial adulteries apparently don't). They may nod politely to the idea of low taxes and small government (although, not lately). But first things first: they will get their war on. The rest of that stuff is, at most, boob-bait for folks like me.

Die, GOP. Go on ... die a little. You literally cannot die fast enough to suit me.

It's Just Like Old Times

Or at least it might be, if them Roooskies will oblige:

BAKU, Azerbaijan — The Bush administration plans to announce a $1 billion package of aid to help rebuild Georgia after its rout by Russian forces last month, administration officials said on Wednesday, as Vice President Dick Cheney arrived in the region to signal support for Georgia and other countries neighboring Russia.

As Lord Darth Cheney would be quick to point out: a billion? Mere chump change. Not worth talking about, considering the potential benefits:

The aid — along with Mr. Cheney’s visit — is sure to increase tensions with Russia, whose leaders have accused the United States of stoking the conflict with Georgia over its two separatist regions, by providing weapons and training to the Georgians. President Dmitri A. Medvedev and Prime Minister Vladimir V. Putin have also complained that humanitarian supplies delivered by the American Navy and Air Force since Russian forces routed Georgian forces and occupied parts of the country were a disguise for delivering new weapons.

Administration officials have dismissed those accusations as baseless.

Speaking of the potential benefits, there they are: we can get our Cold War on! These newfangled "fourth-generation," low-intensity conflicts/occupations aren't working out so well. That nagging little trickle of dead and wounded just never seems to stop, and you're not creating any demand for the really sexy shoot-'em-up hardware -- the ultrastealth fighter aircraft and such -- that are fun to watch, fun to talk about, and that really fuel up the profits tank for LockMart and GenDyn and Boeing and Northrop Grumman. How excited can you get over yet another piddling contract to up-armor HMMVs? Time to go back to a Good War of the sort we know how to run, and that gets Tom Clancy warming up his word processor again!

The aid package, which is expected to include money for rebuilding Georgia’s infrastructure and its economy, is scheduled to be detailed in Washington later on Wednesday by Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, the official said. President Bush is also expected to release a statement.

It is not clear whether the package will include any direct military support, which officials have acknowledged they are considering.

Instant translation: Oh hell yes, it's "direct military support." If "officials" were vigorously denying it, we'd have to consider it only "likely;" since they're not, the rating goes clear up to "lead-pipe cinch."

The aid package reflects an intensification of the administration’s support for Georgia, though President Bush and his senior advisors have yet to settle on any punitive actions against Russia.

Yeah, in much the same way as I personally have yet to settle on my exact and specific plans for spending my first trillion dollars. Russia is a net exporter of energy. Russia heats Europe, and Europe can see from the calendar on the clubhouse wall that winter's coming. What do the Russians have to fear -- they're maybe going to get kicked out of the G8? Hear that vodka-fueled laughter!

Mr. Cheney arrived on Wednesday in Azerbaijan on the first of three stops in the region the Russians consider their “near abroad” in what one of his aides last week described as an effort to bolster countries in the face of their more assertive neighbor. Mr. Cheney is scheduled to visit Georgia on Thursday, followed by Ukraine.

Yes, these are places the intransigent Russians consider their "near abroad" -- that is, they are places that actually border Russia. This would be as opposed to, say, the U.S. and Iraq, which are half the world apart. Apparently, irony is dead at the New York Times.

While Mr. Cheney’s plans to visit Azerbaijan and Georgia were made before Russia’s military operation in Georgia, the trip took on added significance following the conflict, which began on the night of Aug. 7, when Georgian forces tried to seize control of South Ossetia, only to be driven back when Russian forces poured into the country.

Although a ceasefire ended the fighting, Russian forces have still not withdrawn from parts of Georgian territory near South Ossetia and another breakaway region, Abkhazia. Russia last week recognized both as independent countries, a move that has failed to win any international backing.

Hmmmmm ... wonder how much "international backing" Russia needs to recognize independent countries? That might not be the sort of enterprise that really requires a Coalition of the Willing.

Azerbaijan, like Georgia, is a former Soviet republic that has sought closer ties to the West and the United States, and it is considered a vital crossroads for oil and gas from the Caspian Sea.

Underscoring the point, Mr. Cheney’s first meetings here in Baku were with representatives of two international oil companies: William Schrader of BP Azerbaijan and Robert Satmalchi of Chevron, according to a spokeswoman, Megan M. Mitchell. She said they discussed “their assessments of the energy situation in Azerbaijan and the broader Caspian region — especially in light of Russia’s recent military actions in Georgia.”

There's a couple of paragraphs that surely need no comment from me. If it's necessary for us to pick one or more wars -- direct or proxy -- with the Russians in order to secure appropriate business conditions for BP and Chevron ... well, consider it done, Darth Cheney says.

And by the way, Obama/Biden supporters: has the "change" ticket gone on record denouncing our idiotic "foreign policy" vis-a-vis Russia? Short answer: nope. They're fully on-board. Don't you just love our good old American democratic 1.0000001-party system?

Das Führerprinzip

I'm tellin' ya, some days I think I'll just replace the entire template of this-here blog with a redirect to IOZ. Other days, he just pisses me right off, so that wouldn't do. But today's one of the "some" days:

The utter crassness and apparent unanimity of the Donk's pivot on the Importance of Experience, now that they have some dummy chick to whale on, is the sort of Soviet touch that makes me suspect our empire may be perne in a gyre, as the poet put it, of greater speed than I'd be otherwise inclined to believe. At first the Experience line was vague, just a thin notion that Palin lacked the requisite CV, that maybe she was a little underqualified, but hey, we'll keep your resume on file for a year and maybe call you if something opens up. Now, however, it has coalesced around the idea that We Live in a Dangerous World. How can this bimbo Keep Us Safe.

There's more. You should go read it.

"A Journey of a Thousand Miles ... "

... begins with a single step:

Step 1 - We admitted we were powerless over our addiction - that our lives had become unmanageable.

Here is a little glimpse into those unmanageable lives:

ST. PAUL, Minn. – The president and first lady were surprised but thrilled by the selection of Sarah Palin to be John McCain’s running mate, Laura Bush said Monday in her first reflection on the GOP national ticket.

“I’m proud I’m going to get my wish to vote for a Republican woman,” Mrs. Bush said.

O Modern Conservative: it's time for you to take a long, unblinking look into the mirror.

You have a problem. You have an elephant problem.

You felt strong and carefree when you tipped back the glass and voted for Ronnie Reagan. I'm not being all holier-than-thou here ... I took a big snort of Ol' Ronnie, too.

You felt all stylish and grownup and sophisticated with your George Herbert Walker Bush cocktail in '88. So did I. I know how it was.

You had another shot of Bush One in '92. I didn't join you for that one -- I was in my first step or two -- but I understand. Anything would be better than Billy C., right?

Next time, no more happy party atmosphere; you were drinking purely for anesthesia. You held your nose, steeled your gut, and tossed back an oily-looking glass of Dole '96. Didn't taste good, did it? And oooohh, man -- that aftertaste! Especially when, within months, you were seeing Viagra commercials featuring Bobby D., and Pepsi commercials in which he was creepily drooling over tomorrow's megaskank, Britney Spears. Good times, huh?

Then, in 2K, things just got worse. You found yourself back drinking out of the Ol' Bush jug -- the newer vintage this time -- without being able to remember why. Same story in '04. Both times, the alternative seemed to involve another beverage from That Other Distillery that also didn't seem particularly healthy. (You were right -- it wasn't -- but you had alternatives that went unexplored.)

And now, here it is, 2008, and you find yourself facing yet another Most Important Election Ever. (Funny how that seems to happen at clock-regular four-year intervals, isn't it?) "Aw, what the heck," you say, "one more can't hurt."

Wait. Stop. Look at the mirror. Like what you see? Do you look like that stylish, debonair fellow -- only a little tipsy! -- out celebrating on the town, the guy you thought you remembered being? Or do you look more like a stinking, unshaven stumblebum who's about to be kicked out of yet another downscale bar?

Come on -- let's get a cup of coffee and a sandwich. Bankrupt though you are, one thing you really can afford is a big ol' double shot of the truth, and I'm buying. Truth is, you don't have a "movement." Truth is, you don't have a political party. Truth is, you don't have a voice in the media. You have a rough, rough road ahead of you. I don't see any political "success" in your future. You're going to have to admit that you've been wrong about some things, and foolish about many more things still.

There are a few good things that you can look forward to, though. You can look forward to speaking honestly, without any regard for "party unity" or the necessity of winning this year's Most Important Election Ever. You'll be able to call a clown a clown, and not have to choke down your gorge as you make excuses for the inexcusable. You'll be able to exercise what George Orwell said was the essence of freedom: being able to say that two and two make four. And when the question is "what's the cube root of 537" and you're temporarily in doubt, you'll be able to just say so. It's liberating.

Anyway, I'm Jim Wetzel, and I'm a recovering conservative. I've been sober for a little over eighteen years now. There's a meeting here as often as I can manage it, and there are daily meetings in lots of other places, too.

I'm hoping to see you around.

Another Modern Internet Miracle!

Did you know that the latest digital video equipment has so much bandwidth, and such high sensitivity, that it can even record the subject's inner monologue? This will revolutionize politics -- soon every candidate will be an open book, as transparent as a perfectly-polished windowpane.

As a little bit of a "pilot project," let's find out what Senator McCain really thinks about his veep-candidate-designate:

Walk vs. Talk

IOZ nails it again:

Dahlia Lithwick is one of those smart, witty writers whose inability to grasp the nature of the country in which she lives, despite all the evidence splayed (flayed?) before her eyes, ears, and intellect persists. The Democratic Convention, just for instance, has locked down the affected portions of the city as if under martial law, complete with circling helicopters, as well as your favorite and mine, "free-speech zones." Razor wire, blast barriers, and more than four dozen "agencies" coordinating "security." The people protesting illegal detention are being illegally detained at the behest of the people Lithwick expects to address illegal detention. Must we point out again that when a gulf appears between talk and act, the acts reveal the true belief? Yes? Yes.