The Criminals Investigate Themselves

Let's see. With El Presidente clearly convinced that Death From Robots Above is an effective political Viagra -- a magnificent aid to electoral potency -- I wonder why there'd be a little ambiguity about our supervisors' pursuit of that most terrible of modern criminals: the Leaker. Officially, this is all so triple-dog-dare secret classified that we just can't even confirm-or-deny, ahem, cough-cough, but every subject of the Empire can read all about the Maximum Leader's death-list meetings. Let's investigate:

Recent revelations about clandestine U.S. drone campaigns against al Qaeda and other militants are not part of two major leak investigations being conducted by federal prosecutors, sources familiar with the inquiries said. Most detailed information on the drone wars, which were initiated by the George W. Bush administration but expanded by President Barack Obama, is highly classified, officials said. But Obama and top administration officials, including White House counter-terrorism chief John Brennan, recently have been alluding more openly to drone operations in public remarks, and detailed news coverage has been widespread. The CIA has not filed a "crime report" with the Justice Department over reports about Obama's drone policy and a U.S. "kill list" of targeted militants, an action which often would trigger an official leak investigation, two sources familiar with the matter said. They requested anonymity to discuss sensitive information. By contrast, the CIA did file a "crime report" following publication by the Associated Press last month of a report disclosing the foiling of a plot by Yemen-based Al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula to attack an airliner using a newly designed underwear bomb, sources said.

We're reading a news story about investigations into leaking, and the news story itself is the product of leaking about the leaking investigation. Can't this be made a little more meta-? Maybe someone should investigate the leaks about the investigation, and someone else should leak some "sensitive information" about that investigation. And so on and so on. Life surely is complex in organizations that keep hit lists for murder, like the Gambino family, or Murder Inc., or the US government.