Thursday, September 22, 2005

Now, Here's a Really Good Idea

Slacktivist has an idea I really like. America's Wartime Patriots currently think "supporting the troops" consists of buying one of those 99-cent magnetic ribbons at the Gas 'n' Go and slapping it on the trunk lid. Meanwhile, they're putting George's War on our grandkids' credit cards. Slacktivist suggests that the USO sell these fine magnet-ribbons for $500 for a "full-sized" one, and maybe a mere $100 for a little one -- the proceeds presumably to pay for the war. That way, we could see who really supports the war, even to the modest extent of ponying up some bucks.

After all, what's five hundred clams, compared with your life ... or your kid's ... or maybe "just" a lifetime, disfiguring wound?

If I know my 'Murikkan People, I could live with a war that could be financed in this way. It'd be so small, you couldn't tell it was going on. It wouldn't be much more than a few rude postcards per month, addressed to "Osama bin Laden, General Delivery, Some -Stan Or Other. And maybe a few forceful minutes in Pig-Boy Limbaugh's monologue, once a week.

Let's do it ... today!


LP Mike Sylvester said...

You sure are right; if everyone had to "pony up" this "Conflict" in Iraq would fizzle.

I am a military veteran. I am a big fan of our military; I always have been.

lemming said...

Love it!

I am so tired of those magnets. Fly an American flag or tie a ribbon around your favorite tree (oak optional) but enough with the magnets.

GWB bankrupted every company he ever ran up until the Texas Rangers and Texas had all sorts of debt after his term as governor. I sense a trend...

throwaway said...

It's always struck me that these ribbons are magnetic. Could there be a more hollow endorsement. They we're ready to rip those things right off the second the said troops came home. And the ol' paint job would be none the worse for wear.

I read your plea for support at poor man and wanted to express my solidarity. We have long suffered of this AND the last administration, and the one before that and the one before that. W is the most demonic one yet, but the advantage of his monumental arrogance is that he has wrung down the curtain to give us firsthand view of the conspiratory mechanisms we had long suspected but could not verify. At least now we know we're not crazy for thinking. The advantage of his monolithic arrogance is that he will tear it all down before he is through, he will not rest until he has exhausted his power and spent himself.

Grace said...

Excellent idea -- but the yellow ribbon magnets are extremely underpriced. Shouldn't they run about $2500 each (based on the current cost of the Iraq war)? Of course, at that price, people would probably want to bolt them onto their cars.

I used to think that maybe the Treasury Department should bring back war bonds until I realized that, at this point, virtually every Treasury bond is a war bond. Did we ever finish paying off WWII and Korea? I'm not even going to ask about Vietnam.

Bartleby said...

Lemming -- I wish I could say it was my idea, but all credit goes to Slacktivist. Anyone who can think up a blog name as good as that can br relied on to produce other clever and memorable things, too. As with everybody else, I disagree with him about a good many things, but I always enjoy his writing.

Throwaway -- you're right, the Dubya and Clinton disease goes back much, much farther in our history than just those two. Why people lust so for a "strong leader," I don't know ... the creature most anxious to be led is, I suppose, a sheep. Free people don't need "leaders" -- not human ones, anyway.

Grace -- I agree that $500 for a magnetic ribbon is far too cheap. But even at that relatively modest price, I am confident that 99.9% of our safely-civilian war cheerleaders would decide to do without one. I think civilians love war -- as long as the only effect it has on them is the addition of a little spurious color to their otherwise meaningless lives.