Tuesday, October 01, 2013

No Government! Oh, No! Nooooooo!

I see in the news this morning that we have no government.

Hmmmmm.  What does this mean?

To start with, why do I say "no government?"  What about the states and localities?  Don't we have all those multiple levels of supervision?  Well, of course we do.  But those aren't real government.  Those are just the local satraps.  Those are just provincial underlings.  Yes, of course they get to point guns at us -- that hardly makes them unique; pretty much everybody gets to point guns at us -- but in terms of Holy Policy, in terms of the Rules, these local underlings themselves rely completely on that swampy little corner of Virginia and Maryland for their own supervision.  So, I'm sorry; but in real terms, we have no government.

But once again: what does that mean?  Let's summarize.  Here, we read:
Monday afternoon, Mr. Obama had described the potential closures in the case of a shutdown. He noted that “every one of the parks and monuments” would be immediately closed. That process began early Tuesday as park officials restricted access to some of the country’s most iconic locations and barricades went up to keep out tourists.
About 8 a.m., the steps of the Lincoln Memorial were being taped off by National Park police and metal barricades erected, and tourists were being turned away. 
 [ ... ]

The National Zoo in Washington closed its gates to tourists. Zoo officials said they planned to flip off the two cameras that feed images to the popular “Giant Panda Cam” Web site for fans wanting to watch the rare new panda cub that was born last month. As of 6 a.m. Tuesday, however, images of the pandas were still streaming.
A message on the zoo’s Web site said that “all vehicle, pedestrian, and bicycle paths into the zoo will be closed. None of our live animal cams will broadcast.” The Web site added that “all the animals will continue to be fed and cared for. “
But, here:
The federal government was then left essentially to run out of money at midnight, the end of the fiscal year, although the president signed a measure late Monday that would allow members of the military to continue to be paid.
This basic concept will no doubt be familiar to everyone who remembers previous so-called "government shutdowns."  The government isn't shut down at all.  Instead, its functions are being separated.  Think of it in terms of the old economics-class "guns and butter."  The butter -- the nicey-nicey stuff, the national parks and the space program and all those things that they want you to think of, when you think of them -- that's all off, and in as showy a way as possible.  The guns, though: that's the true essence of government, and, believe you me, that's purely business-as-usual.  The drones will still fly and kill.  Our supervisors' bodyguards will still be getting their pistol practice in.  DEA goons will still kill anyone they feel like killing, as Officer Safety will continue to be Job One.  And perhaps the guy who hung the CLOSED sign on the National Zoo will then be off the job, but think for a moment: what if you or I decide to push through the tape and go have a close look at the zoo, or the Washington Monument, or whatever?  Think there won't be somebody with a gun still "working" who'll show us what a bad idea that is?  Those folks will be working overtime.  And getting paid for it, too.

Do you suppose O'Bomber will have to make his own coffee?  Do you suppose Michelle will be darting about in that vast, unfamiliar kitchen, whipping together a little grilled-cheese sandwich for the Presidential Lunch?  Do you think our legislative supervisors will have to go out to Subway for lunch, owing to the Senate Dining Room being closed and deserted?

Yeah, me neither.

Remember: guns 'n' butter.  No butter (for some); but lots and lots of guns.  In fact, I'll bet the rent money: more guns than ever.


Mimi said...

One of your best, Jim. I shamelessly put the link to it on my blog and I'm not going to say I'm sorry, because I'm not!

Jim Wetzel said...

Thanks so much, Mimi! I am going to say I'm honored to be linked from your blog, because I am.